I'm running my 3rd half marathon on Sunday and, shockingly, I'm not freaking out at all. Compare this to my first half last June where I was all kinds of nerves. Last year I had no idea if I could even run 13.1 miles, was kind of injured, and a total mess. I followed that run up with another half a few months later where I was totally relaxed (my only worry then was that I might come in dead last since there were so few runners).

Anyway, this time around I know that I can run 13.1 miles so I'm going into it like it's a casual 2+ hour site-seeing tour of Portland. There will be no racing (I "ran" 12 slow miles last Sunday and my hips and feet checked out around mile 9). So yeah. I'm cool. I'm looking forward to our drive to Portland (with the usual pitstop at Dick's sausage so I can carb load with beer) and the race is on a fun route through cool neighborhoods and sections of the city that I'm not very familiar with. There is a 3+ mile uphill stretch along Hawthorne that happens early on and I refuse to let it scare me (I'm hoping the spectators and some perfectly timed songs on my playlist will help me out). Afterward, Robert (who also running -- go Robert!) and I will make a bee line to our favorite Portland beer joint and I'll start planning my next run.

Oh, there is just one thing that I'm stressing over. What to wear...

I hope that The Dot won't be upset that I'm writing this. I just want to point out that a lot of positives can come from something that initially seems quite negative.

The Dot (pictured left, running from the camera) was diagnosed with ADHD late last year which explained many of the problems that she was having in school (low self esteem, problems remembering, social anxiety, depression). She was not doing well and Robert and I were at our wits' end trying help her weather the storm of emotions, sadness, and helplessness. How to help this smart, funny, talented girl? How?! I'm happy to say that things are much, much better now. We pulled her out of school. She now takes medication for her ADHD, sees a behavioral therapist and works on courses through the public school's Interagency Program (a blend of courses through the downtown YMCA and an online academy--she has currently completed almost 3 credits so is still right on track for a 2013 graduation). So yes, we have an atypical teenager, spending her teen years atypically. I'd never in my wildest dreams think this is what would be best for her but at the moment, at least, I'm more than happy with the outcome.

Pros:
-She is happy (usually).
-She is building confidence.
-She's learning independent study skills.
-She is excited about learning; she actually looks forward to waking up Monday morning and logging into her course.
-She is remembering more, learning more, asking more.

Cons:
-She doesn't have any friends her age.
-She's not learning social skills.
-She's not being challenged.

You could say that the cons far outweigh the pros. I beg to differ. All in good time. Let's work on the happiness, first. Happy people make good friends. She's enrolled at a traditional high school next year but she's not sure if she wants to go. To be torn from her 2 self-paced courses at a time and thrown back into a 6 period schedule will be extremely difficult. So we wait. We. Wait.

Very recently she started talking about goals--the future, college, her dreams--which makes me so happy. The fact that she sees a future where she has a place is so hopeful.

Meanwhile, she's making great use of her free time doing art (she usually spends about 4-5 hours a day on school work and every other waking moment with her Intuos tablet in hand).

click to embiggen
   

Here she shows screen captures of the process of how she created that last piece (the top left image is the original photo she looked at when she began):

Just in case those of you with younger children are interested, here's how much it would cost your child (annually) to go to the 3 state schools in western Washington (in 2012, of course).

UW
Tuition & fees: $12,233
Books & supplies: $1035
Food & housing: $9969
Personal expenses*: $2000
Total: $25,237

WWU
Tuition & fees: $8793
Books & supplies: $1050
Food & housing: $9372
Personal expenses*: $2500
Total: $21,715

The Evergreen State College
Tuition & fees: $7569
Books & supplies: $241.20 (heh, this is really what they quoted)
Food & housing: $6830
Personal expenses*: $2500
Total: $17,140

*Personal expenses vary and are based on having a kid who is pretty frugal and introverted. If your kid lives closer to home their personal expenses will go down because they can come home and mooch off of you and do their laundry there.

Compare this to a private university (NYU, which is more expensive than many private schools, mainly due to housing costs)
Tuition & fees (College of Arts & Science): $42,114
Books & supplies: $1070
Food & housing: $15,756**
Personal expenses: $3050
Total: $61,990***

**Housing can be cheaper if you're willing to sacrifice some stuff. Sid, for example, is going to apply to the low cost housing at NYU which will save him $3-5K. It might mean he has 2 roommates instead of 1 (with 1 bath) and he'll be in the one dorm without a/c which means he'll be miserable during September. Now, Sid wouldn't be a cool intellectual/writer if he wasn't sweating in front of a fan in NYC, right?

***We could never afford full price for NYU. But factor in Sid's scholarship, his work study, and the savings on a low cost dorm and it's about even with UW. Of course, he could and probably would get a job while going to a state school but factor in all the internship options he'll have available to him as an undergrad at NYU and there's no question that New York City is the place for a writer.

So there you have it. Start saving (or do it the crazy way like I'm attempting to do).

Last year I wrote a post about trying to come up with an extra $1000/month and not being very successful at it. I figured out why I wasn't successful. It's because there was no urgency to it. It was a "could I do this if I had to?" Not a "oh my god, I have to come up with more money this very minute!"

Now, a year later, I really need to come up with more money. For reals, guys. For reals. And guess what? I did it. I made a new budget and not only did I come up with an extra $1000, I came up with an extra $2500! $30,000 A YEAR. And there will be very little suffering involved. Some sacrifices, yes. But at most, I might end up with few white people problems.

Let's look back at what I wrote in last year's post and the current situation:

"I can't just take the bus and be o-okay with the commute time and the hobo smell."

Taking the Bus. Actually, I really don't mind the bus so much. I've had to ride it a lot more this year and it's decent. It gives me the opportunity to have some downtime where I can listen to podcasts and zone out while I people watch. My life isn't that hectic anymore so I can't complain that it eats up valuable time and walking 13 blocks to my stop is a nice healthy walk. I just can't find anything to complain about when it comes to commuting by bus (but this doesn't mean I'm going to start taking the bus daily; the plan is to instead park off campus and walk or bike in on most days --I'll get as much or more exercise as walking to/from the bus stop-- and park on campus for $5 on days when I need my car (rarely)).

"I like wine a lot more now."

The Drinking of Wine. There's a big difference between enjoying a glass of wine and drinking ALL THE WINE. I no longer drink wine at home unless I'm having someone over. That Black Box cabernet on the shelf isn't super wonderful and by the 2nd glass it's just a bad, boring habit. Done. (Also, I lost 3 pounds.)

"I love having my hair professionally colored."

Stubborn Grays. I haz them. I won't give up getting my hair colored. I'll just let it go longer. Learn to love it. Embrace the gray.

"I love our gas guzzling car."

I love my car. Yes. Love. And it's almost paid off! No regrets.

"Our children have become accustomed to Odwalla drinks, Mexican coke and beach vacations."

Spoiled kids. Funny, we quit buying Odwalla drinks and Mexi-coke at Costco months ago and there's been very little complaining. Beach vacations? I don't think they really care. And at this point, they're just grateful when we leave them alone.

"Our cats stick their noses up at anything but stuff that comes in a can and costs more than my lunch."

Picky cats. We discovered that our younger cats really like kibble better than the expensive wet food. I tried for months to find wet food brands/flavors that they'd consistently eat because wet food is supposed to be better for cats but in the end I gave up. They now eat Before Grain chicken kibble (well, actually, Gus is temporarily on a special diet to prevent urine crystals but I don't even want to talk about it). Gumby still eats wet food but he will die soon, wont' he? He just turned 19. He will die soon, right?

So here's where the latest savings are happening:

• $600/month. House refi. Yes, it was meant to be a principal reduction loan but extra payments will mostly be put off until after the kids finish college.
• $140/month. Parking off campus. I'm not even going to get a UW U-Pass. I'll pick up an Orca card and just put $20 on it; see how long it lasts.
• $400/month. Less booze. Yes, that's huge. But we were kind of out of control. We'd go out for drinks sometimes 3 times a week in addition to buying specialty beer and the occasional $13 bottle of wine. That all added up. Now I think I can get away with 1 Black Box/month plus 3 or 4 outings w/ friends. And Robert, well, he likes his beer. But he's doing a fine job of spacing things out.
• $200/month. Less dining out. We rarely dine out as it is so how are we even saving on this? Well, when we don't go out for drinks we automatically don't go out for burgers. Our dining budget also includes lattes and Robert gave up his latte card. His work provides coffee from a fancy coffee machine so it was a mostly easy thing to give up (except I think he enjoyed fetching it from his favorite shop and walking with it to his 2nd office).
• $50/month. Gas. Less road-tripping and weekend scenic drives = less gas. We live in a beautiful city and there are so many things we can do and see on foot or a 10 minute drive away. Enjoy Seattle. (We are going to Portland in May and might be going to Bend in September. It's in the budget.)
• $200/month. Groceries. I have time to compare prices and shop around for better deals. I quit Amazon Fresh (it was too convenient! Crazy things just ended up in my cart!) and started doing most of my shopping at Trader Joe's and Fred Meyer. I now shop very rarely at my favorite store, Ballard Market (just too expensive when compared side-by-side to products at the other stores; I still go there in a pinch or when I need something special). I do several no-meat dinners. I buy some mediocre stuff. Cheaper olive oil is okay. So is cheaper salt. I went to buy some corn chips the other day. I like the round chips but the triangles were $2 cheaper so I bought the triangles. Is that a tragedy? No. The kids are becoming pretty frugal as well; mindful of what things cost. Recently we've been sending Zoe on solo shopping trips with cash in hand. It turns out she loves to compare prices and get stuff on sale. Yay! We still spend about $700/month on groceries but I think I can get it down to $600. That's $5/person/day.
• ~$1000/month. Less other stuff. We won't do any big home improvement projects or go all out in our garden. Our gifts may be less generous (but hopefully still as thoughtful and memorable). We're already way down on entertainment spending (less than $100/month for tv/movies/cable/derby/festivals), and have made up for it big time by spending our free time running, walking, and reading. No more extravagant clothing purchases (glad I bought those $60 CEP socks BEFORE I went all budget crazy).

I'm holding my breath, hoping we don't have any crazy emergencies. We are all currently healthy. The car runs great and she has new tires. The side sewer is practically new. The roof has at least 5-10 more years. The house siding could use a paint job but no one's going to complain if we wait another decade. The water heater is fairly new. The furnace could blow...

Funny how urgency changes things (which proves that I can't really be a frugal person just for fun...apparently I work better under pressure; had I had this attitude from the beginning I could have saved enough for my kids to go to college 3 times). Granted I've only been working on this for 6+ months and only really seriously budgeting for 13 days. Can I stick with it? Can I afford to keep my kids in college without them taking out a ton of debt? One can hope. I think it's worth it.

I also hope we won't be a huge bore to all our friends.

Allow me to whine.

I have a running injury. Again. I can't seem to go a year without doing it. In 2010 I killed both of my Achilles tendons trying to run "barefoot". In 2011 I strained a calf muscle less than 2 weeks before my first half marathon. I thought this year would be different. I've kind of felt invincible since my 2nd half marathon back in September. Since then, I've felt stronger, faster, and all the little aches and pains I'd had in the past have gone away. I've been working on my intermediate half marathon training plan; no drastic changes from what I'd been doing all winter, really. And then wah-wah.

It was a simple run, nothing fancy. 3.5 miles, maybe. Mostly flat. I was enjoying Girl Talk, possibly jogging (not running) a little faster than I normally would for an easy run (9:30 vs. 10). Nearing the end of the run I felt a tweak in my hamstring. No wait. The back of my knee. No wait. My Achilles? When I got home I massaged my calf. There was a tender area in that spot where the meaty calf muscles meet the Achilles. If I pushed it with my thumb it said, "Well, hello." So I took it easy for a few weeks. No speed work and I skipped a few days. I iced my leg and it felt fine. Not perfect but fine.

I was feeling 99.9% normal last Tuesday so I headed out for an easy 4 miler. I felt slow and that odd hamstring pain came back. I wasn't really concerned. (I was more concerned about the rain I was getting drenched in.) Then, around the halfway point, I felt something give way and felt a pain in my calf that stopped me in my tracks. Martha Focker! The rain had stopped but I was drenched and a mile out. I limped and shivered my sorry ass home. I haven't run since.

My half marathon is just under 6 weeks away. Wah-wah.

I have a theory. I'm naturally a weakling and my muscles are puny. Last July and part of August I dedicated all of my non-running days (and days when I only ran 3 miles) to doing Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. Those months and the following 2 months after I quit "shredding" were my strongest running months. I bet the very last of the muscle tone I'd built up shredding, the tone that kept me injury-free, fell off my scrawny ass a few weeks ago and the rest is history. Tonight I biked and did upper-body work plus a little yoga. I'm hoping to shred (sans the lunges) by the weekend and by the following weekend, only if I'm 100%, I'll do a short, easy run. I won't stray more then 1 mile from home. Just in case.

Martha Focker.

photo credit: erica816

The Boy has heard back from all the colleges he applied to and we have most of the financial aid packages as well. Here's where we're at:

UW - Accepted.
No scholarships.
Loans offered: $3500 Stafford sub, $2000 Stafford unsub.

Hunter - Accepted (rejected from Macaulay Honors).
edited to add that he was also offered admission at 3 other CUNYs: Baruch, Brooklyn, and Queens College)
No financial aid package yet.

WWU - Accepted.
$3000 scholarship ($1500 is one year only).
Loans offered: $3500 Stafford sub, $2000 Stafford unsub, $13,956 Parent Plus.

TESC - Accepted.
$900 scholarship.
No financial aid package yet.

NYU - Accepted.
$31,000 scholarship!!!!!!!
$3000 work study.
Loans offered: $2400 Perkins, $3500 Stafford, $2000 Stafford unsub, $20,060 Parent Plus.

So what does this all mean? First, it means that NYU is more affordable to us than UW. Crazy! That scholarship was very unexpected since we'd attended an open house last summer and they told us the average financial aid package (including loan offers) was $26K. NYU is also more affordable than Hunter (at least currently, the financial aid package may change that but I can't imagine they'll be offering any scholarship money). The Boy applied to Hunter mainly because I told him we couldn't afford NYU. I'm still having a hard time wrapping my head around it. At first, when I saw the loan package I cringed. Only later did I realize that, duh, we don't have to take on all the debt.

One factor that isn't in the summary above is our financial contribution as parents. When my kids were in daycare I paid about $1200/month. We were so broke but we somehow managed. Now we make a lot more money and while I haven't saved a penny for their college I figure I can muster that same $1200/month to help out with school. We need to pay off our car (totally doable if we sell our 2nd car that we never use) and I may have to drink a little less wine (that's probably a good thing). Sid also has a little money saved which will help him out his first year, at least.

WWU and TESC are still the most affordable options but The Boy isn't showing any interest in either.

So where does that leave us? Well, it leaves The Boy with a big decision to make. If he decides on NYU, he will probably graduate with some debt. He'll at least have to take the Perkins loan and possibly the Stafford loan depending on how much money he can earn working this summer*. Best case scenario he leaves with $9600 debt or less. He also has to maintain a 3.0 GPA and he will have to have a roommate (heh, he told me last night that the only upside to Hunter over NYU was that the dorms were all singles).

So. Wow!

I spent all evening looking at all the NYU dorms, reading reviews, checking rates, etc. I'm so excited. I love New York and I love the NYU campus. I never got to do the dorm thing so I'm totally jealous. I think that The Boy is pretty excited, too.

*A summer job might pull in a few thousand but he also has the option to defer NYU for a year (none of the other schools offer deferment). With an extra year he could earn and save a lot more money (and also decompress, chill out and relax). When I mentioned this as an option he stressed how much he needed to get out and start his life NOW. Leave. Go far, far away. Aw, we feel so loved.

My grandmother had this old photo in one of her albums.

I've always liked it, the piano bench, the sheet/curtain and Thel's sailor dress and puffy hair; the look of mild amusement in her eyes. I especially like my grandmother's caption: "My Aunt Thel who always treated me like a mother"*

Zoe got an Intuos tablet for Christmas and ever since she's been experimenting with the painting program that came with it. She asked me if there was a photo she could paint for me and I chose this photo of Aunt Thel. Here's the final version.

Zoe did such a great job! She's torn because she was wanting to develop her oil painting skills that she learned last summer in her art class but once she found out how easy it is to mimic the look digitally (and nothing to clean up!) it's really hard to go back to traditional painting. I hope that she'll continue to do both.

*I didn't know much about Aunt Thel so I asked my mom if she knew anything about her. Her reply: "Aunt Thelma Halberg Callahan. She was my Grandpa Sanders cousin but was raised as his sister because Thelma's mother, (Grandma Halberg) raised him as her own. So Thel was considered his sister and therefore my mother's aunt."

You know, this doesn't look so hard. After this race is over maybe I should look into the advanced training schedule for the Sunriver half on labor day weekend. Or, you know, train for the full marathon instead.

Whoa. Hold on there, missy!

I don't want to jinx myself here. I just need to stay uninjured and run a good run. If all goes well then maybe. Maybe.

Last summer, for fun, The Boy read War and Peace. This mid-winter break, for fun, he finished up Moby Dick and A Confederacy of Dunces. During Christmas break he read A Christmas Carol and Great Expectations, you know, for fun.

He also reads books to review for his school newspaper. His most recent review was for Stephen King's new book 11/22/63. He gave it a grade A+ all the way to infinity.

While he tries to read stuff that he thinks his classmates might be interested in, he ultimately ends up picking books that he thinks HE will enjoy. His next review is for a book outside his preferred genre. It's called Wintertown and it's young adult fiction. He hasn't written the review yet but has hinted that he's considering giving it a C (which means I'll probably like it).

Shouldn't a kid his age be working? Well, yes. He applied, interviewed, and tested for a Seattle Public Library student assistant position a few months ago and was accepted but has to wait for an opening before he can start working. So meanwhile, he reads. He's completely abandoned Grand Theft Auto IV and all other tv/video time (with the exception of some Futurama now and then and occasionally I can force him into watching a movie with me) so I suppose this is a good thing.

***

In other "The Boy" news, he's received acceptance letters from both CUNY Baruch and CUNY Queens College but has to wait until March 15th to hear back about the honor program acceptances (or feared rejections). He's still waiting to hear from CUNY Hunter, CUNY Brooklyn, NYU, UW, WWU (and Evergreen, which he's yet to apply to).

I've been trying to come up with a graduation gift for him and if he ends up staying in Washington State for college I think I'll get him a train ticket to NYC. He's had this Kerouac-type fantasy of packing up his books and stuff and taking a cross country trip, you know, a trip that will become some amazing memory he'll always look back on and maybe even become a story he writes about one day. I figure If he can't move there then at least he can take a cross country trip on his own. Some kind of story should come out of that, right? Looking at cows. Trying to ignore screaming children. Getting lost. Eating train food. Giving all his cash to a stranger out of the goodness of his heart. Sharing his small sleeping quarters with said stranger who ends up farting all night and sneaks out in the morning with The Boy's luggage and favorite book. That kind of stuff.

A few weekends ago Robert and I took off for a little 2-night getaway. We did several of these last year and, while fun, they do end up costing more than we should be spending (little-r* is an adorable gas hog). However, it was a special occasion (our 23rd anniversary) so we flipped our middle fingers at our budget and went ahead and did it.

Rather than just heading straight to Portland as we always do (yawn, we are predictable) we went a round about way through Snoqualmie Pass (holy pouring rain and miserable conditions) and Yakima, on through a depressing little town called Toppenish (at least it appeared so from the highway) and then through a beautiful woodsy area heading towards Goldendale (also oddly sunny and warm compared to everywhere else nearby), and on to the Columbia River for about 40 miles until we reached Hood River, Oregon.

We stayed in the Hood River Hotel right in town. We could have stayed at a more resort-y hotel right on the river but we wanted to be in town so we could just park our car and walk everywhere (cuz there be lots of drinking to do in Hood River).

Our hotel "room" was really a whole apartment. For $100/night it was ridiculously HUGE and our view of the river was very nice. The only downside to the room was that it faced the adjacent railroad (trains come through every few hours ALL NIGHT it turns out). Still, the location and price canceled out the noise issue for me (although it'd be nice if the hotel would set out some ear plugs on the bedside table).

River Views

Hotel Suite
 
 

We immediately made our way to Double Mountain Brewery to sip beer and eat pizza. I enjoyed a Rainier Kriek and a Peche Mode and the the Jersey Pie pizza was yum (I kind of hate pizza these days so I forget that it can be good). After beer and pizza (and a Devil's Kriek growler fill for Robert) what else can one do in a town like Hood River but taste wine! We stopped at the Cascade Cliffs tasting room (where I picked up a Nebbiolo and a Syrah) and then we headed to Springhouse Cellar because we were told by the people at Cascade Cliffs that Springhouse sold wine growlers (at that point I was feeling a little tipsy so the goal was to pick up some wine and sushi and head back to our room to veg and watch Downton Abbey before we passed out). We made it just in time for a quick tasting and I purchased a 1 liter growler of their Ruins Red and picked up a bottle of Petite Syrah (which I think they told me to wait on for 6 months or so; things were getting hazy so I can't be sure).

The rest of the evening went just as planned. Yummy sushi, and beer for Bob and wine for me. Downton Abbey on the tee vee and then I spent most of the night being awakened by trains (I made the most of it and got up each time to watch the trains pass --it was kind of fun, actually).

We packed up in the morning, ate an early lunch at Bette's and headed to Portland via historic route 30 (past Multanommah and various other falls).

Here I go with the unnecessary gushing: Hood River has it all. Beer, wine, small town cuteness, views, & food. A great place to stop if you're ever in the area. I'm finding so many places in Oregon that I love; Hood River comes in a close 2nd to Bend.

Little-r, all prepared to leave Hood River (the hotel is the brick building in the background)

We stayed at The Jupiter in Portland (seems like I've stayed there at least a dozen times but it turns out this was just my 3rd stay). We did our usual Portland stuff: Powell's, Cascade Barrelhouse, and Doug Fir. And some new stuff: Green Dragon ("100 Best Places to Drink Beer in America" -- hmm, I wasn't that impressed), Stepping Stone Cafe for breakfast (apparently the cafe's mancakes were featured in an episode of Man vs. Food; we opted for omelets), and I bought a new pair of running shoes at Fit Right Northwest (I figure I should start breaking in a new pair before I really get into half marathon training).

On our way out of town we drove through a major portion of Portland's Rock n Roll half marathon course. Can't wait to go back with my running legs ready for a PR!

*little-r just passed 70,000 miles this past week. We've put 22k on her since we got her in May 2010. Wow!